today is may 27. happy birthday to me! #geminiseason

I am writing this in the early hours of the day as we just arrived home from our 2 week mini vacation to Toronto + Montreal and jet lag is fkn real – even though its only three hours time difference! i may also be extra tired from 2 weeks of wedding parties, flights, late nights + possibly a few more bevvies than usual from an amazing underground tequila + mezcal bar we found in old montreal! more about that coming soon.

Every year as the end of may approaches, I find myself reflecting on memories from the numerical age I’m about to bid farewell to, and anticipating what the next year will hold. at midnight on the way home from the airport I found myself wondering how am I 44 + why are the years flying by quicker + quicker? i certainly don’t feel mid forty, well most of the time. I am definitely trying my best to not look it!

yearly reflection usually takes place on New Years eve or day, but it seemed appropriate to take my own time + reflect on some things I’ve learned over the past year. Self-awareness is an on-going, never ending project. Most of the things I’ve learned I have known for some time but they have been reinvented in my life over the past year(s) … lessons!

here are 10 things I’ve learned about myself, life + love over the past year.

+ my health is so important + 100% my responsibility.

Yes, this one is pretty straightforward! however, I’m certainly realizing that my age is (somewhat) starting to speak to me. I can’t just eat or drink anything I want without REALLY feeling the after effects anymore. I have to be so mindful of what I am putting into my body. hence, the big reason I am plant based + have significantly reduced my alcohol intake. I really notice that if I don’t workout or include some type of movement into my day I just don’t feel as good, mentally + physically.

But more importantly, I’ve learned that healthy living isn’t just about the food I eat, or exercise I do to stay “healthy”. My health is also based on my environment – the people I am in a relationship with, interact with + the choices I make.

It’s about creating a healthy + holistic lifestyle with health in mind rather than just eating right + exercising. I think being healthy is really a state of mind. If you want to be healthy it’s discovering + learning WHY it’s important (if it is important to you) and what affects it. I know my gut senses unhealthiness – in my body, in relationships or situations. It’s not a good feeling, but the journey to find what feels good for us + what works for us is necessary to make sure the good feelings are here to stay.

+ shit happens. it’s up to me to make the best of the situation.

shit happens. all. the. time.

and when shit happens to you over + over again, things keep coming up constantly that you didn’t plan for, don’t like and just can’t avoid or get out of, it is f’ing exhausting.

the simplest and not so easy truth is that regardless of how often shit happens to you, you have to keep on fighting. take the time to be human – cry, scream, throw something (or something at someone!) but then pick yourself up, try your hardest to be positive + make the best of it.

looking back, I’m seeing now how some of the things I’ve gone through are shaping my personality, or causing me to see things differently than if I hadn’t have gone through them. the truth is real. all the things that have happened may never turn into positive things. The truth is it may still be awful, sad or hard. and that’s ok. who we are because of our experiences is priceless. we grow from them, and hopefully become a better version of ourselves.

+ I am my own best cheerleader.

To believe in yourself is so damn necessary. I’ve found that if I don’t cheer for myself most likely no one else will + to be honest, I can’t expect it either. the best person to believe in who I am + what I am capable of, is me. I am my best cheerleader.

It’s awesome to have a fan base and support system behind you. But to expect it + rely on it is unhealthy. it will lead to disappointment + have you questioning yourself. If you know you are beautiful + capable + believe it, the power of that belief is stronger than any other person’s voice or opinion. In a time where everyone loves to have an opinion about someone else, the only opinion we should truly care about is our own.

+ if I want something done, i best do it myself.

if you’re waiting for something to happen in life or for someone else to do something for you. stop! its tiring, disappointing + useless. It’s great working in teams, having partners + collaborating on something personal or professional. however, you may not always have the luxury of having someone else getting things accomplished or done with you or for you. You just need to step up, figure it out + do it yourself. plus, so it is so much more rewarding.

+ i don’t have to be, nor should i be, everything to everyone. It’s not good for them + it’s not good for me.

that’s all.

+ I am not defined by what do, what I’ve done, or where I am in life.

this is one of the hardest lessons that I continue to keep learning. I pride myself on what I’m capable of, can do or have done. I have to remind myself I am not defined, worthy, meaningful, precious or important because of the things I do or have done.

In a world where we watch edited lives on social media and compare our background life to other’s highlighted reels, it’s so important that we understand, respect + love ourselves. Take the time to figure out you first. strip it all away + see what’s left. Being transparent isn’t + shouldn’t be considered a weakness. It’s your own unique strength. Your own self-brand.

+ I have one body in this lifetime. I owe it to myself to spend more years learning to love it than hate it.

through all the changes with age, thyroid, injuries, hip issues, the extra 10 lbs that just won’t leave me … I am slowly learning to cherish the very basics of my able body—the ability to walk without pain, to enjoy great food + to do physical activities like yoga, pilates + lagree that I love. I have to remind myself daily not to take these abilities for granted.

+ it’s okay to stand up for something and not be liked because of it. 

The world loves followers. people who break molds or stand up to things are always the looked down upon + pointed out. Standing up against or for something you believe in is okay. choosing the harder choice is okay. You leave knowing that it was your choice, no one else’s.  regardless of the outcome, you’ve just become that much stronger.

+ managing stress + getting a good sleep are the two most important things I can do for my mind + body.

its so easy to supplement + support your well-being nowadays with great supplements, but there is no nutrition plan, workout or superfood that can replace or have the same effectiveness as consistent, quality sleep + adequate stress management. my favorite ways to manage stress are through my morning wellness + evening wellness routines.

+ there can be no honest love without respect.

and that’s the truth.

xx.